positive

It seems my world and the people in my life are absolutely obsessed with being positive. Being positive has become something to flaunt to others that you possess. Proclamations such as, "I'm too optimistic to ever be negative" is something many say in a smug tone.

I have a few questions. Namely:

1. why so positive?
2. is it possible for everyone to be positive?
3. is it bad to be negative?

For one, being positive is easy if the circumstance are right. Nobody should be proud that they are positive-thinkers if their situation is favourable. If they have a promising future, good health, love and money, they have little to be negative about on a personal basis and therefore easy to be optimistic about life. But, if you are one of the billion people that go to sleep hungry at night; if you are one of the thousands of Iraqi mothers that watched their son be mercilessly murdered; if you are on of the many little girls that were brutally raped during a night raid by a militia group in Africa; if you are one of millions of Palestinians that watched with humility their home they spent a lifetime creating bulldozed to the ground in front of their family, then you have nothing to be positive about, and any positivity is admirable and commendable.

This leads to my second point, that positivity is not as clearly a mindset that you are born into or decide to have as it is a product of your thoughts and circumstances. It requires a certain amount of ignorance. It requires one to shield themselves in a bubble that blocks out the "downers" of the world, like the situations that one could find themselves in that I previously listed. You could know of the miseries in the world, but you can't sympathize and understand them at a deep level, for that will naturally make you less happy to feel their pain.

You must also only look at the bright side, and pay little attention to the negative side. What you decide to focus on is highly determinant of your mood. If you think of the bright side, and skim past the negative side, you'll be able to possess optimistic thoughts. This is fine, but it is nonetheless a conscious effort to ignore many sides of an issue.

One must, ironically, be very negative about the way things can change to be positive. The only way you can truly embrace the present, and not feel a malaise for society, is if you believe that now is good, and that it can't be drastically better. It also requires you to think that we are in a better or just as good a world relative to the past, for if you don't believe this, you will naturally have negative thoughts about your world.

Finally, the question, is being positive bad? Well, I would say no. If you are a person that sees the problems in the world and is positive and hopeful about change and are therefore optimisitc it is a very good virtue to have. However, I would describe this person more as a positive negative person. They do not say things like, "I'm so happy. I love this world. I love my life." If you want to be a happy wanderer it is okay, but you are part of the problem. Happy wanderers don't want change, or at least don't care to put in effort to make change. They have a good life and a clear head. Their life is good enough that it is not worth it to them to spoil their happy times with all the negativity in the world. But they consciously have to avoid raising topics about things that are important, such as wars, poverty, capitalism's ruinous and polarizing order. Instead they indulge in positive conversations about food, sex, wine, clothes, music, and the like.

I would say the best kind of person to be is a positive negative person. Positive negative people are aware and sympathetic to the problems of the world, but believe in change and know that things can't be perfect. They have hope and are the drivers of change. The understand that things can be much better and work towards those goals. The embrace the problems of their world instead of ignore them.

mazeh

"Mazeh" is Persian for "taste". It is used in more ways than "taste" is in English, and I am concerned with one way in particular, when it is used to say something felt good.

If I say something "mazeh daad" or "mazeh kard" it is adding a verb to the word "taste," making it an event. Literally, "it gave taste" or "it did taste".

Something has to feel very good to say this expression. For example, taking a bite into a cold, sweet and juicy watermelon on a hot summer day... "mazeh meedeh (it gives taste). Or taking a plunge into refreshing water after hot and sweaty labour... "mazeh meedeh."

Or teaching your child how to read and then watching them become more and more skilled... mazeh meedeh.

I can't think of a literal English translation that really captures this sentiment. The closest would be "it feels satisfying" but this really misses the sentiment.

The point I wish to make is that rarely in life do you experience something that gives you "mazeh" if it comes upon you without effort. This is especially true for the bigger events in one's life. I am going to go out on a limb and make this assumption: people who had to really work hard to impress and "win" the heart of their loved ones are much deeper in love than those where things just seemed right and both decided to enter a relationship. If you had to "win" the heart of your loved one it makes her that much more precious.

The same is true for your job, your house, your car, your money, your life. If these things are handed to you, it is hard to appreciate them. If you work hard and earn them, it gives you mazeh.

The worst kind of parenting is that where you deprive your child of mazeh. If you want happiness for your child, let them earn their life. "There is no such thing as a free lunch" is true. You can offer them help and give it to them if they ask, but never go ahead and give it to them out of "kindness". And if they ask for too much say no. And if you do wish to help them get on their feet, do it in a minimal way and try to take some back.

Would you want a life where your career, your first home, your wife were all chosen and given to you by your parents?

Well neither do they.

name one

101,658 civilians dead in Iraq. I watched the war report everyday. Yet I can`t name one. not even one name. Is our media that shallow and cowardly that it does not have the courage to name victims? Why are REAL wars watered down to the same level as hollywood blockbusters? for viewing pleasure is right.

in a bubble

a protective shell that keeps us sane, or often happy,

like the reinforced steel cage of a car that keeps us alive.

what a virtue to possess, to block out the world and see only light.

to read of the deaths of civilians while thinking about the freshness of the toast you are indulging.

to read of wars over water while enjoying the sweetness of your orange juice you are slurping.

like a child in a playground, like a fish unaware that it is wet, we live blissfully and ignorantly.

The woman singing in her car, believes she`s happy. knows she`s happy. feels happy. but does not know happy.

the man in his loft, believes he`s comfortable. know`s he`s comfortable. feels comfortable. but does not know comfort.

the man who thinks he's nice, but has never met a real nice person.

the woman who think's she's polite, but has not met a real polite person.

the boy who loves this song, but does not know music.

the girl who loves this boy, but does not know love.

who are we to proclaim, to feel, and to describe, when we have not seen, felt or experienced.

both children and adults only know what they know, but it is only adults who believe they understand what they know.

show me love, happiness, music, and comfort, and then i will understand what i know, and know what i feel.

take be backwards and forwards, so i know where i stand.

take me left and right, so i can stand straight.

take me into the fourth dimension, so i can understand the third.